If you associate yourself with me in anyway, know that it’s best to not keep secrets or lie to me.
My investigative reporting background has taught me to not only know just by looking at you that something is up, but how to figure out the truth.
Yes, I figured it out. Yes, I’m hurt. Yes, I’m heartbroken.
No, I don’t care anymore.
He chased me like he wanted to kiss me…he did
He kissed me like he wanted me…he did
He touched me like he needed me…he didn’t.
Tomorrow I am going to be standing next to my best friend while she burries her father.
MJ and I have been friends for almost 20 years. Since the first day of kindergarten this girl and I have been at each others side. Her parents were like a second set of parents to me. I was always staying with them when my parents would go out of town for the night, I tagged a long on family vacations, and I call her parents “Mom and Dad,” without even thinking about it.
MJ being the only child either of them ever had, from their POV even I was their adopted daughter. When her parents got a divorce when we were 11, she had a brave face. We didn’t even know until her mom invited myself and our other friends over to her new place. But still, her mom always had me along for family vacations and her dad always let me come over to help around the farm.
Her dad loved that I had pet ducks and always asked me about them.
She told me he was happy that she had a friend like me.
Tomorrow is going to be possibly the hardest day of my life. Not only am I saying goodbye to a man who is like a father to me, but I have to watch my best friend say goodbye to her father. The man who taught her how to ride a bike, encourage her to take risks, and the man who was supposed to walk her down the aisle when she gets married next year.
All I know is our friendship has been more like a sisterhood throughout the years. I’ll stand by her no matter what.
Rest In Peace Dad Kachurik. You are missed so much <3
Why do we let people who arn’t worth our time get such a grasp on us? It’s like I can’t go a night without thinking about him no matter how hard I try, no matter who I’ve talked to, and even though I’m trying to fall for someone else.
I guess it’s just the way the story goes. Girl falls for boy, boy gets scared. I wish I knew what he was afraid of. But the possibility that someone could actually give a shit about him is his kryptonite. Being a loner is like his oxygen.
I’ve been introduced to a handful of great guys since I met him, but none of them even matter. I can’t even bring myself to fake like I’m ready to dive because I’m not. God knows if I got thrown into the deep end I would drown.